Are You The "Down for You" Girl

Ride or die, down chick, wifey type: Just some of the words used to describe the type of loyal women some men are searching for and the woman most of us are aiming to assume the role of. What exact characteristics does a "down for you" girl possess?

For some men, they are simply searching for a woman who can be there when he has everything he desires but also stick around if that wealth diminishes or even disappears completely. They have goals in life and strive to accomplish them while maintaining the belief that, realistically, things don't always happen the way you planned. Success takes time and through life's great journey, some battles will be lost. They need a woman who will not only reap the benefits but also brings something to the table be it finances of her own, emotional and mental support, or making moves assisting in his progression to the next level in life. These men are often few and far between.

For the majority of men, it’s a woman who can put up with all his vices, whatever they might be, and continue to remain loyal to him within their exclusive or non-exclusive relationship. Some of these men expose these flaws candidly before anything serious occurs, giving women the option to back out if the situation deems unreasonable based on their own personal morals and values. Sadly, most women take on the challenge in hopes of becoming his one and only. Some of them will even settle for being his "main". Nevertheless, these women stumble both blindly and with deaf ears into these relationships with unreasonably high expectations. How will they save themselves the heartbreak that is a foregone conclusion?

What these women fail to realize is these men, though not bad people, are not the right fit for them if they are seeking a serious, long-lasting, successful relationship. Overwhelmed with the combined fear of missing out on a possible relationship and the fear of loneliness, they will bend over forward and backwards to not only please him but in addition prove their loyalty, even if it means sacrificing not only their own happiness, but also that of the ones closest to them. There is pain deeply rooted in his past that will prevent him from giving you all you need and deserve. You can't fix him, change him, or convince him to want healing from that pain. He has to want and seek it for himself. If you are constantly proving your loyalty to him, how can you ascertain if that loyalty is being reciprocated?

As unavoidable as heartbreak is, women can avoid a lot of wasted time just by thinking instead of feeling and simply setting some general standards and sticking to　their guns. If you don't know what you want, you'll settle for whatever. Mapping out a clear list of what you want, what you expect, and what you refuse to tolerate in a relationship will help you weed through the unsuitable guys and pick ones more worthy of your time and attention. Some women find this difficult only when they have a man in mind prior to creating the list. They unconsciously focus their requirements around what they know the man is willing to give. Big mistake. You'll never be truly happy if you grin and bear it, compelled to overcompensate for what little he gives when you know whole-heartedly you deserve more. Even if he tells you he'll do better or give more, focus more on his actions and less on what he says. Any man worth having will focus on doing all he can for you and less on how much you are willing to do for him. Like said before, that man will have requirements of his own so you much meet him at whatever middle you all have established beforehand.

So think...what type of "down for you" girl do you want to be? The kind that sticks with her man no matter what he does or says because you know he'll change for you if you remain completely loyal? The kind that puts up with the worst parts of him in hopes of someday reaping your just rewards of the best he has to offer? Instead, be the one who takes control of your life and be the "down for you" girl YOU deserve. Look out for your own heart by using your head to create a blue-print for the type of guy who earns your love fairly and isn't given it by default.

The American Dream

What exactly is it? It began as a way to uplift people by giving them hope for the future. An add assurance that no matter who you were, what you looked like, where you were from, or how old you were, anything you want in life can be gained with hard work and dedication. It has since changed into The New American Dream focused on an obsession to obtain more specific things like money, notoriety, homes, and careers, all of which must be based on society's sentiments; the more, the better. Wealth has become the national measure of success. Some of us use this new-found outlook as a way to motivate ourselves. We set goals, make sacrifices, and strive relentlessly to grab hold of this irresistible reward. A portion reach what they've aimed for, while the rest spend their entire life trying.